Swimming in Korea

Swimming in Korea was the most awkward experience of my entire life. I have never, ever, made so many faux pas in such a short space of time.

On Saturday me and Ric walked half an hour out of town to find ‘Cheonan Sports Complex’ – a huge area containing the city’s football stadium, volleyball stadium and an Olympic swimming pool. We thought it would be nice to go swimming as we went regularly back home.

We were doing well, we’d found the pool, managed to pay (£2.50 for both of us) and were all ready to swim, only when we got into the changing rooms things got weird.

First of all, everybody was naked. People were blow drying their hair – naked, chatting to their pals – naked, talking on the phone – naked, showering – naked, weighing themselves – naked! I had wondered whether it would be possible to get a wax done here in Cheonan – not anymore!!! Korean women definitely favour the natural look!

Once I recovered from the shock of walking in on a 70’s porno I quickly got changed and headed towards the pool, only to be stopped by a naked woman who told me “no cap no swim” and pointed to her head. After getting dressed again, going to reception, going to the swimwear shop and almost making a phone call to the absent shop owner from a Korean pensioner’s mobile, I found a lifeguard who told me “boyfriend two cap” – Ric had found me a swimming cap and was waiting in the pool.

Now I’ve never worn a swimming cap before in my life; nor have I ever tried to squeeze my particularly large head into a condom but I now realise the two are the same. As soon as I started swimming it pinged off and nearly took out a child’s eye.

Swimming cap adjusted, I realised that not only was I the only 6ft tall western woman among the 300 people in the pool, I was also the only woman wearing a bikini. All the other women were much more modestly covered up; costumes, t-shirts and shorts!!! Now that’s embarrassing.

At first I wondered why no one was actually swimming in the pool so big I couldn’t see one side from the other, but I soon learnt that in Korean swimming baths you can only swim for 50 minutes at a time. Then you have to sit at the side and have a rest for ten minutes. Public safety.

Additionally, the water was 50% chlorine 50% bleach, it stung my skin and eyes. The Koreans swim to one end of the lane and then queue at the other before setting off again.

We were both cringing so much that we barely lasted half an hour before getting out and re-entering the chamber of bush to get dressed and run home in shame.

Dressing I made yet another massive blunder. After showering (not naked) I went over to my locker to get dry and dressed again, only once I was there I realised that everything and everyone around me was bone dry – I was the only wet person by the lockers and I was leaving a big puddle everywhere I went. You’re supposed to get naked and dry yourself with everybody else in the communal drying area! Could have been worse though – Ric did exactly the same only he had a group of little children tugging at the towel around his waist and trying to shoo him back into the drying area.

I wont be in any hurry to go swimming again in Korea!!!